Have you ever felt stuck? That feeling of being bound to something you don’t want to be bound to…or that feeling of being trapped, unable to move….stagnant.
Feeling stuck is just that, it is a feeling. We often feel obligated to do certain things, when in actuality, we are not obligated to do anything. Obligation is more of a feeling than a fact. You may have sound reasons for doing a particular thing but that doesn’t mean your life will end if you don’t (usually). Take for instance, a job. Let’s say you are “stuck” in a job that you do not like but you go everyday because you “need the money.” You feel stuck because it feels like you don’t have a choice but in actuality you have plenty of choices: (a.) you can quit on the spot (b.) you can begin to plan what day you will resign (c.) you can start looking for other jobs or other ways to generate revenue (d.) you can try to change things within the job, like your schedule, so that it fits better with your life (e.) you can go to work everyday and do as little as possible (f.) you can say “F it all,” slap your boss and run into the sunset 🙂
…The point is, you DO have options, they just may not be the options that you are currently ready for.
..but why is it that we never feel like we have choices? It is because the mind is very powerful in convincing us of things and so is society. We all have strong thoughts and beliefs that tell us we have to do things a certain way because it is the right way (or the only way) to do them. Often times, we are also held back by fear, “well if I don’t do this, all hell is going to break loose” —it isn’t—.
In actuality, doing something that makes you miserable (especially if you do it every day) is one of the worst things that you could possibly do. In doing so, you are damaging your overall well being (physical & psychological). Going against our own desires, is a form of “self-torture.” When we get stuck, we are holding the part of us that is fighting to be free hostage. We are saying to that part of us “no matter how much you beg and plead, I will continue doing these things that make me feel stuck”. Furthermore, the longer that part is restrained , the more “inappropriately” it may act out. We may start doing things we wouldn’t normally do because we are dying to be free. That “inappropriate behavior” may come out in different ways. It could be something as subtle as us cursing more….it could mean something more harmful like using drugs that are toxic to our body…and sadly, it could also mean the most severe consequences (acting violently against ourselves or others).
So how do we get “unstuck” ?
Acknowledge that you have choices. Once we acknowledge that we actually have choices, the feeling of being “stuck” isn’t as present. There is something powerful in knowing that you don’t have to be in any situation that you find yourself in. One great thing about being a human being is our ability to choose. We may not take advantage of all of our choices (sometimes for good reasons) but we must realize that they are always there and that we can access them if we need to.
Put in action. So you want to leave that job, relationship, etc.? Start realistically planning how you will do so. Write out your options. Write out the pros and cons. Write out a plan and a time frame. Search and apply your options. Take actions that will actually lead to your goals even if they are small actions (i.e browsing potential jobs). Accessing your Freedom doesn’t mean you have to make abrupt choices (like quitting on the spot), it just means that you start to acknowledge the freedom that you do have. The more you acknowledge and feel your freedom, the less stuck you will feel in any situation. It also helps sometimes to look at the big picture, asking yourself questions like…
- “How will I look back on my decisions 10 years from now?”
- “If I died a year from now, would I be happy with the decision I have made?”
- “What is really stopping me from making this happen?”
So if you are feeling stuck, now is the time to get unstuck! Life is too limited to stay in one place that you don’t want to be in. You alone have the power to change the course of your life. Start accessing your freedom today!